Jesus Has Not Ever Spoken to me Like I am Stupid...

Recently, I was responding to a text from my husband...punching out the letters to each word rather aggressively, with an incredibly snarky tone rolling through my head. Right before I hit send, I heard it so clearly. I had been feeling this but had not yet been able to articulate...

Jesus Has Not Ever Spoken to me Like I am Stupid.

In the weeks coming up to that moment, I witnessed several encounters -- good and bad -- that seemed to be sticking with me more than most. There was the super sweet lady working at Panera and then the other at the grocery store. They were way more kind than they had to be.

There was the snobby lady at the nail salon who, right in front of her daughters, treated the nail technician as though she were inferior and dishonest. Next, there was the waitress who treated my husband and me with such poor service that it actually made me cry.

But then...one day, I was sitting at a table doing some of my schoolwork. I was so frustrated because I had forgotten my earbuds. Had I remembered them, though, I would not have experienced one of the loveliest conversations I had heard in a while.

A mother...with a genuinely sweet spirit sat down with her daughter, who was eight or nine years old. The Mama laughed with her, told her stories about her thoughts and feelings, asked her opinion, and engaged with her as though they had been friends for years. She treated that precious girl like she mattered...like her being there was the best thing that happened to her.

Now, back to that moment when the text to my husband was ready to send...

a song began to sing in my heart, making it impossible to do anything but erase the evidence of my selfishness and send something far more kind.

"I have been unreachable I have been unteachable I have been unwilling And I've been undesirable

Sometimes, I have been unwise I've been undone by what I'm unsure of But because of You And all that You went through I know that I have never been unloved"

I had experienced the kindness of God.

If you were to go and spend time in Psalm 103 and Psalm 107, you see that people are not just singing because they have "found themselves." Their melody is not about them overcoming. These are songs about the loving-kindness -- the chesed -- of a God who, many times and for various reasons, has patiently waited and faithfully delivered them from themselves.

That sweet Mama at the restaurant made me think of my Mama. When I was a drugged out, no good for nothing...when I rarely bathed and smoked like a freight train...I not only lived a filthy life, I was drenched in the smell of it. But my Mama would pull me close and hug me as if I were robed in white and draped in rose petals. She never spoke to me as if I were stupid. I'm sure she felt like I was. I am positive she was disappointed in my choices, but just like the Psalmists, she was compelled to love others because of who He is.

It is Christmas...a time of celebration to bring glory to our Savior who came so long ago and will come again to deliver us. Our interactions really do matter! Whether at work, as a consumer, or with our families, in public or private, responding as Jesus has responded to us...connecting as though we are in love with the King who came to save will help others know His loving-kindness!

"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Pet 4:8:11